“Clearly there’s been a deliberate effort on the part of the people involved”, said a spokesperson for the band. “If you mention ‘Sneak’s Noise’ to any of the 75 nominating committee members – or even one of the approximately 1,000 music-industry professionals who vote on the committee’s nominations –  you’ll get a blank stare. The person will act as though they’ve never even heard of Sneak’s Noise.”

The band’s debut EP, A Surge of Existence, sold anywhere from 117 to 10,742 copies, depending on whom you ask. Add in the approximately seven or eight illegal cassette and home CD copies, and you get a certain number that may or may not be divisible by itself and one.

No Moss on This Stone

Since Surge’s release, members of the band have pursued their own illustrious careers. John Taglieri’s upcoming CD features the likes of legendary drummer Kenny Aronoff. And Tony Donato – Jack Brag founder and pioneer of the “punctual rock” movement – has just finished production of a Yoko Ono tribute album.

Thanks for nothing, Cleveland.

Weehawken, NJ  North Jersey rockers Sneak’s Noise announced today that they plan to re-disband by the end of March. A spokesman for the group confirmed that the band members had been considering a series of comeback appearances, until it was discovered that a modest combination of focus and effort would be required on their part. Talks to reconsider the renewed dissolution remain stalled; however, all members will get to keep whatever health benefits they had under the old arrangement.

STONYBROOK, NY  Citing the now widely-circulated Mayan prediction of the world’s end tomorrow, erstwhile North Jersey rockers Sneak’s Noise have announced plans to give up.

“What’s the point?”, queries frontman Ralph Carey. “If the Earth is completely destroyed, it will be a lot tougher to get gigs, especially paying ones.”

Added bassist Gus Tobar, “What the f&*k?!!”

Despite the apocalypse, vinyl copies of the band’s EP, A Surge of Existence, remain available. Please see the Store page of the band’s Web site to order yours.

February 22, 2012    Edging out voter sentiment for a Foghat reunion by 2 to 1, North Jersey-based rock band Sneak’s Noise has garnered – as of 2:45pm today – a whopping three votes in its Web site poll. The poll has been active since July, and asks visitors whether the band should ever play again. It’s clear that the public is eager for Sneak’s Noise to return to the stage. The only question is whether the boys will ride this wave of excitement into another gig – before the fervor abates.

As ever, Noise fans are left wondering.

Although the band never released a chart-topping single or commemorative mug set, its music left an imperceptible mark on all those affected by it. In response, fans of the Noise have been refusing to mention this indignity to anyone. Many have taken to acting as though they’ve never heard of the band, a show of solidarity likely to continue through not only this April’s induction ceremony but also televised coverage of it in May.

Meanwhile, members of the band and their immediate families have elected to stay away from this year’s nuptials. Some of them may even refuse to watch it the following month on HBO, particularly those not subscribed to cable or satellite TV.

THE WORLD WIDE WEB January, 2012  How do you know when you’ve “made it”? When you’ve got an entry in Wikipedia, of course.

While Sneak’s Noise itself has not been granted Wikipedia-style immortality, one of its alumni certainly has. John Taglieri, who handled lead guitar, along with backing and occasional lead vocals back in the band’s formative days, is now on Wikipedia.

“He certainly deserves recognition for his talent, hard work, and persistence” contends drummer and founding Noise member Mike Matera. “Plus, he let us hang onto a piece of his 1988 Mitsubishi Cordia before leaving Sneak’s Noise to join a nationally-touring band. That was awful nice of him.”

Taglieri apparently left behind a removable section of his Mitsubishi hatchback’s rear interior when transporting equipment to and from the band’s rehearsal space. “He joined this other band and never came back for part of his car. That says something about a man’s character and priorities.”

While no one knows what happened to that part of his car, speculation is that John did ultimately return for it a year or two later. Terms of its release were never made public, and it is alleged that he has since moved on to another vehicle.

In any case, the members of Sneak’s Noise are pleased to see John getting the recognition he deserves. To view his Wikipedia entry, please click here.

Reflecting on a year’s relative lack of accomplishment, the members of former North Bergen-based band Sneak’s Noise vowed that changes are in order. Their first goal? Double the number of shows played in 2012 as were played in the past two years.

“As lofty as it sounds”, observes Gus Tobar, the band’s erstwhile bassist, “we are starting with what we believe to be our most manageable goal. In fact, I’m so certain we can meet this milestone that I am upping the ante; we will accomplish that feat by the middle of the new year.”

Time will tell whether the band can muster its collective will and make good on its promise.

NORTH BERGEN, NJ – Narrowly averting a statute of limitations, a North Bergen man has filed a noise lawsuit against his erstwhile neighbors – New Jersey rockers Sneak’s Noise – despite the fact that the band hasn’t rehearsed next to his house since 1992.

“This has nothing to do with the fact that I haven’t had an income in 14 months”, notes the band’s former neighbor, Jacob Alvarez. “Those guys played at full volume, two to three nights a week, for five years. My attorney says my ears are still ringing.”

Amplifying Alvarez’s case is the allegation that Gunther “Beatle” Brown, owner of a Union City nightspot where Sneak’s Noise once regularly played, often had his fiancee inform the band members that they were “too loud”. A string of character witnesses and band members has been summoned to a hearing, which will determine whether Alvarez’s case is sound enough to go to trial.